Press Release (04/01/2014):

Astounding. Disruptive. Revolutionary. Ben Franklin may have invented the bifocals, but today - Bear Lincoln Laboraties brings you BEARFOCALS.

Utilizing only the latest and greatest in emerging technologies, the musical band Bear Lincoln has announced they have now revolutionized the world of wearable electronic devices too. BEARFOCALS are now available available online at http://bearlincoln.bandcamp.com/merch - the Bear Lincoln store - for one day only - the first of April, 2014.

Bear Lincoln BEARFOCALS broadcast several channels of video including music videos, exclusive interviews, and a 24/7 Bear Lincoln video feed (no, you can’t turn it off). You also get an exclusive login to Bear Linkedin (the premiere bear-to-bear social network for professional bears).
16, 32, or 64 bearabyte memory configurations available - BearPlay compatible with other devices. Polar(Bear)ized lenses allow you to clearly see Polar Bears, wherever they may be hiding.

The device also dispenses beverages, sploozes doozes, and much much more (new content added regularly). Order today - April 1st - you won’t regret it.

-Bear Lincoln